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SotA Community First Series Entry: Between Worlds

edited June 2015 in SotA Stories
Can you truly ever choose between worlds?  One has been all you've ever known, all you hold dear.  The other, uncertain, but exciting in its possibilities.  It is nothing less than deciding between two different lives. 

You pray and wait for the signs that would make it clear.  Signs that would make it easy to embrace one, and consign the other to grateful memory.  But they never come. You are left in a waiting room that has two doors that go in completely opposite directions.  How far can I keep going before the choice is made?  Am I already too committed to run back to the other?

It is possible to be balanced on the edge of a knife, slowly being split into two as you remain.  Each option keeps you stuck: perfectly balanced between the fear of deciding poorly, the difficulties of the path and the potential good that might come. 

But time itself sounds an alarm.  As it presses you forward, potentialities disappear and new ones open.  Ultimately, deciding to stand still is not an option.  You will be pushed, kicking and screaming, into a choice - perhaps the only one that remains.

Standing on the heights of all that has supported me and sustained me and made me who I am, I still hesitate.  Can there be no looking back, no regret, as I lose hold and plunge into the abyss of new possibilities?  It will do me no good to lament my finiteness anymore. Yes I must decide, and in deciding, step forward once again.

Yes, this day, I choose ale. Or wait, no, mead. Gah! Ok, an ale please!

Comments

  • As expected, I can find no grammatical errors or typos. That leaves style, which is completely subjective. I shall note the places where your way of expressing things differs from mine - not as a criticism, but really just me noticing our different styles. I thought it might be of some interest. Differences are highlighted.

    One has been all you've ever known.  

    Am I already too far committed to run back to the other?

    perfectly balanced between the fear of deciding poorly, the difficulties of the path and the potential good that might come
    perfectly balanced implies two things, but then you immediately list three

    You will be pushed, kicking and screaming, into a choice, perhaps the only one that remains.
    that's a lot of commas :)

    Standing on this precipice of all that has supported me and sustained me
    a precipice is scary - I'm having trouble imagining it supporting and sustaining

    I like the surprise ending. For most of the text I thought you were deciding between The Hidden Vale and Earth.  :)

    Very well written and most enjoyable. I don't expect you to agree with me - as I said, it is subjective.

  • I like your suggestions.... 

    I'm glad you fell into the trap I set.  I wanted to come up with a simple SotA choice, maybe ale and mead?  But I don't know...
  • Ale and mead might be better, now that you mention it.

  • edited June 2015
    LOL, i totally got sucked in - good ending!

    couple things I did see:

     One has been all you've ever known.  All you hold dear. 

    I would make this all one sentence, 'all you hold dear' is a fragment i think.
    so would be:
    One has been all you've ever known, all you hold dear. 


    You pray and wait for the signs that would make it clear, make it easy to embrace one, and consign the other to grateful memory.

    I think this one is a run-on sentence, might be better: 

    You pray and wait for the signs that would make it clear.  To make it easy to embrace one, and consign the other to grateful memory.

    :)

  • The choice has been made. The die has been cast. May you never regret it!
  • Thanks Sophi, changes made!

    Let's hope Kate I don't regret posting this haha!
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